Tanner

For some reason, I used to think that no guy was off limits. Even if they were dating some of my best friends. This girl wasn’t very nice, so I didn’t feel real loyalty toward her and this blog is all about me learning from my mistakes so don’t judge me.

In tenth grade I hung out with the swimmers. Don’t ask me why since I wasn’t a swimmer and basically everyone else was, but I was in the middle of trying to find my niche. Tanner and Shelby were the star couple. She was beautiful, he was attractive. She had a bad temper, however. And Tanner got bored easy and didn’t put up with much. They weren’t the best couple. I would constantly get calls from this girl crying about what awful things Tanner said to her and then he would call me and complain about how immature and crazy Shelby was.

In his defense, Shelby was ridiculous. Her goal in high school was to be known as a… not very nice person…  she definitely lived up to her goal. So it’s understandable that Tanner was upset. It doesn’t make what we did okay, but it makes it more understandable on his part. And on my part, I thought no guy would ever like me so when one did, I jumped at the opportunity.

We started talking more and more and meeting up in between classes. I really enjoyed his company- when he wasn’t complaining about Shelby, and he seemed to enjoy mine as well. Then one day, we were walking out of seminary together and he grabbed my hand. I was shocked… I didn’t know what to do, so I just acted like nothing had happened and holding hands was a normal thing.

After thirty long seconds, he dropped my hand, turned to me, and said, “Chelsy. You know I’m with Shelby.” I was so shocked. I didn’t know what to do. I just laughed, hit his arm and kept walking. That was it, though. I was hooked. I followed him everywhere after that. We talked everyday after school and I would stare at him from across the table all through lunch.

We were both in choir. One night after a concert, one of the boys started playing the piano and Tanner and I got up on stage and sang and danced together. For a minute, I forgot Shelby existed. We got all our stuff together and headed for Nelson’s frozen yogurt- because that was the cool thing to do back then. On the way there, Tanner said, “Chelsy, you look cold. Do you want my jacket?” I did want his jacket because a.) I was freezing, and b.) That’s what they do in the movies when they like each other.

“Yes, Please!” I said eagerly.

“I can’t give it to you.” I looked at him questioningly. “It would look like we’re a couple. You know I’m with Shelby.” Shelby… right. My friend… his girlfriend. I shrugged my shoulders, turned up the heat and the radio, and soon the conversation was forgotten.

When we got to Nielson’s, we got in line with the rest of our friends. Again, he grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together. Still confused, I pulled away. “You’re with Shelby, remember?” I asked.

“Yeah I know. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. Stop trying to hold my hand.” By this time, I was so confused. I got angry and went to sit by some other people. Tanner shrugged it off and went on to the next girl.

I still don’t know what his deal was with that. It still perplexes me. Boys are weird.